Score: 3

"Lessons From Excite Bike"

submission: Adrenaline Challenge!

date: November 9, 2005

Here's what they knew back in 1984.
1. Due to the combined weight of the motorbike and rider, rotation isn't that that easy. This is reflected in real life riders who don't flip often, if at all. Cause they have "momentum" to deal with when they weight more that eight pounds.
2. The bike has a bottom, a bottom to the chasie. You should be draged out into the street and shot for allowing flat ground to impale you.
3. Only the the back tire actualy moves the bike forward. They don't have all wheel drive.
4. I should be allowed to make ridiculously big jumps with out fear of a ceiling or cramped space.
5. A man doesn't die from slight bumps to the head if he's wearing a helmet, or has any sinus fluid. It's like he has a brain aneurysm. Somehow your still rubbery enough to bounce after falling far enough to break your coccyx.

As I see it this came close to being a good game. Real close. But the riders ass should be glued to the seat and the suspention IN THE BIKE should wobble. Not the rider and his rotating feet. I can't be the only one who got the glitch where the guy's spine snaps and his pelvis thrust forward cause I landed to hard. If your going to time us, let us go FAST. Put a delaying animation in the turn around so it doesn't feel so cheap. It could be argued some of these things were put in to make it harder, but instead they come out feeling tedious. It's one of those games that are bad in a way that makes you want to beat it out of spite.

Score: 7

"Was that a british comedy reference?"

submission: Doc Ock

date: October 27, 2005

I could have sworn I heard a clip in there from Black Adder. Good stuff

Score: 4

"Ugh..."

submission: Inuyasha's Halloween

date: October 26, 2005

OK this had alot going for it. It looked sharp but needed better animation. Lucky for you that show doesn't lipsync. Those actors were great. Way better than what belongs online. The sound clips were "accurate" with a admirable amout of detail. As fans of the show I understand why you wanted to be as close looking as possible, but the only way you can respect anyone combining the words "fiction" with "fan" is if they either make a perfect facimily of the original, or go your a direction thats different enough to "make it your own". The way Rumiko Takahashi writes caricter interactions is annoying enough, and you somehow made them worse. They went from two dumbass kids to your two brats. I'm sure that fighting sounded funny at first but it just comes out imature. They main failure here is in the writing. Just throw in some gags that are better than than your ending and you'll have parody.

Score: 4

"Abadox was a better shooter than this..."

submission: Robots Attack

date: September 18, 2005

ok there's alot going for this game but plenty thats messed up. It's another game suffering from being to crampt. There's no part of your body thats bullets won't hit and your legs are just dangling there. They alone are your biggest disadvantage throwing off your symetry and leaving a large portion of your body you just can't cover with steady fire. And no you can't dodge your way around it because the enemy lacks any pattern to base your moves around. The white guy alone can smother you with enough glowing balls so that you just can't avoid them.
The full heals only make sense because you take alot of damage anyway from those bullets that hit you for multiple damage. I could stand for some enemys that don't look as much like you, and were nerfed a bit. And more visual difference be tween your powerups. My advice is to click like mad ,dispite the fact you fire in burts you need to multiple hits to kill even the lowest pawns.

Score: 7

"We all needed a decent checkers game to show up"

submission: Koala Checkers

date: September 15, 2005

No one plays checkers sideways though.
Ok I'm about to ruin checkers for everyone. Ya see there are only so many ways you can even play.

Moving based on how your oppoint has moved. Which is the dumest way but still works on this game. Most people play this way.

My personal Favorite Trying to play a "bait and hook" way by goading your opponent into jumping you they way you want them to so you can counter. Which is making sacrifices inorder to screw up up thier formation badly enough. This method just works on stupid people who don't think ahead enough to catch what your doing.

And the sicking best method that ruins the game. Forget not moving your back row. Just move all of your pieces one space forward before trying to be aggressive. You'll either form a perfect front line, or your oppenent will jump you early and screw up his formation. The only draw back is that if both players are nonaggressive you end up with a draw where there's no space left to move through. This way decimates the "bait and hook" and and the only real counter for it is to move into one of the spaces they needed early.
Ya sadly checkers isn't that deep.
If anyone else has any other tactics they'd like to share please post.

Score: 0

"unbalanced"

submission: Maus Force Attack

date: August 21, 2005

There are resons so many people are finding this game so hard.
Here's a few.
You're to big.
You're not faster than the enemy planes.
Some how your first powered up shot doesn't go as far as the screen is long. WTF?
Everthing else is pretty big.
The way the enemys are dispenced at you wouldn't be so bad if there were some form of gaps between them to let keep trck of enemy patterns.
The enemys feel like ther just being thrown at you with a goal to just shot and move on, without even knowing your there.
Your plane doesn't feel like it's superior enough to take on a whole army with an understandable challenge.
By now we've all seen better JAVA games than this.
Area Flat anyone?

Score: 9

"Great concept!"

submission: Fresh Prince vs. The KKK

date: August 21, 2005

Perfectly absurb mix of goofy popculture references, and things we're usually wound tight over. This if anything, is a relief.
To anyone who got upset over this game I have two words.

NIGGA PLEASE!

Score: 4

"Bad Reprsentation"

submission: Autumn Tree

date: August 8, 2005

Where the hell is the socialism. These kids were hitler idoliters. You completly missed the point of thier motivation, thier influences, environment, and personal style. "Besides" the nazi stuff. Complete lack of gracful transition in thier emotions. Where's the rage and the hate. Where's the drive in these charicters. Basing all the little things on facts doesn't constitute accuracy. You can't throw in references to movies assuming we've all seen them. They don't do a good enough of establish an atmosphere or state of mind in the kids. Your attempt to show it from all angles really leaves you with none. So what if you don't know what they were really thinking and feeling at those moments. You don't have the luxury of knowing thier charicter so craft one! For the love of god you could have given us a little charicter developement.
There's no good reson why you couln't use the real killers names and apperance.
It all to soft. Your leaving to much to the viewer to fill in the appeal of the movie by fantasizing it's deeper than it is. It needs to be more dynamic, and pull you in. Horrible enough to "make" you watch. Insted I see bad anatomy and events that blunty show what's happening. The story seems to told childishly, not meshing well. It doesn't seem done yet. Spend more time in the animation department, and throw in an event or two to let us get to know these kids and watch them change.
You've missed the fantasy.

Score: 6

"slow your roll"

submission: MuayThai

date: August 5, 2005

It lacks good timing when if you can attack again while the enemys are still stunned, or thier just dumb. If there were a better balance between the delay after attacks and stun time it would be more challenging. You need to be less invincible while rolling, it's alowing you to spam uppercuts through most of the game. Fix those problems and you'd have a well balanced fighter. Not bad for an internet game.

Score: 5

"Right click away"

submission: Dragonball Z super quiz

date: August 5, 2005

The quiz is a little screwed up in that you can right click forward to view all the picks, or backwards for the movie. Thats fixable though. Worth not being removed for the live action Piccolo shot and trailer for the game.